Sober is Forever

Chubby Maruko Chan

I'm more than 3 months sober now and of course I have to remind myself how beautiful it is.

Its amazing to be free like a bird like chubby maruko chan.

No craving at all. No drug in the house no pipe no bong.

No contact with my dealer.

Am doing good feeling good and grateful for everything.

Those dark days are gone.

Sobriety is beautiful than I could imagine and worth fighting for.

It's reclaiming of my life and unbecoming to the ultimate version of myself.

The one who remembered himself.

I did have dreams of smoking twice and when i woke up i was so relieved .

I was like who the fuck planted that in my dreams.

I loved myself enough and i banned this body from using any drugs ever again forever.

I proved to myself coming clean, staying off drugs is possible and am my own success story.

I doubted myself far too many times and gave in to the withdrawals countless times as well for years.

There were many broken promises and regrets that followed after but the cycle went on and on.

Failed because I didn't do it right and wanted it hard enough.

Life could be the complete opposite now (if I still around ) without all the life changing decisions made 3 months ago.

I just couldn't stopped smoking , work was tough because of unkind people around and I hardly sleep.

All together combined- Nasty.

Few times I was deep asleep on the bus and didn’t wake up till the last stop and was the last person left on the bus.

Thankfully that’s my stop.

I was wrecked and badly sleep deprived .

The roughly 50 minutes bus journey probably the only time my soul had the chance to do what he had to do.

When I was just a shy away from hitting the rock bottom,

I took a complete break from the world and abandoned my old self.

I returned to god.

I will forever thank god for making this possible.

Only god knows all the struggles and how hard the battles were.

My will power and determination alone wont suffice.

Thank you to all my sistah here in Dublin for the respect giving me the space and time during the most critical phase of my life. Viva forever.

Thank you to all my family back home, am sure they still wishing me the very best even if they have no idea how amazing and adventurous my life is.

Thanks to my dealer for asking about my wellbeing from my sistah. Hope your business isn't much affected by my absent.

Thank you to nature- All my birds family aka therapist and all the beautiful parks around Dublin.

On 20/08/2025 ,I went over to my good friend' place to catch up with each others.

They were 4 of us initially, and one left after we had dinner at Phat Filly

The other 2 were smoking on and off in my presence.

I reassured them it's completely okay and i had no objection for them to do so.

If I cant handle myself and be tempted to smoke then I wouldn't be there.

I stayed till very late in the morning like 0430 before I eventually left because i needed sleep badly and I couldn't sleep on his sofa because of the expected noises.

I was initially worried if I got the urges but I did very well and so proud of myself.

I wasn't tempted despite them blowing smokes after smokes but simply enjoyed being in their company

I remained sober by choice and like to keep it that way for good.

Staying sober is lifetime commitment to myself.

Sober is forever.